(Custom Made Dress/ Thrifted Shoes)
Life isn't always a bed of roses. It's also a bed of thorns. And just like any soil you choose to grow your plants, there will always be parasites. No matter how hard you try to keep those parasites out, they can and will always try to eat you up. That is the sole reason why we should always accept melancholy like a long lost sibling.
Recently, problems have been popping out like mushrooms. I don't know why they seem to be following me around no matter how hard I try to avoid them. Whenever there's a crazy fiasco going on, I get involved and somehow, I always get the blame. I feel like I always turn out to be the bad person. So I ask myself, is it me or the world just turned its back on me? Someone told me that I'm not the bad person in every fiasco I get involved in. I'm actually the confused person. And by confused she meant that I get involved in other people's problems without me knowing it. Maybe that's it. I don't even know and suddenly I turn out to be "bad person". How magical.
So after all the sticks and stones that were thrown at me, I have now fully understood that in this world there is absolutely no one we can trust -- not even our best-est friends can be pure to us. I am left with only a few people whom I can fully and utterly trust -- a few friends and my family. Building relationships with people is difficult especially they are based on trust. It's like playing with fire. And you know what they say about that... when you play with fire, you just get more fire. Think about it. We may have friends whom we have given our trust to but how many of them cherished that trust? We may have friends whom we think we could trust but that's the thing, we only think we could trust them. How will you know if they are loyal and pure to you when you don't even know what will go on after all the conversations and after you part ways as you go home? The truth is, we don't actually know and we can't even trust our friends. No matter how hard you try to keep a secret, someone will always try to find that out. Some may meddle with your life and the person you shared your secret with may tell other people about it. Oh well, that's how it goes. Trust is not imposed, it should be earned. And once that trust is lost, earning it again will be so damn hard.
But then again, who am I anyway? I'm not perfect. I, too, make mistakes. I ain't rich. I get really envious of people who can get what they want without even earning them. But who am I to judge? It really just pisses me when people who have everything don't value what they have or what they are given. And if you ask me how I'm feeling right now, the best photo to describe it is this (to be utterly honest): Lost in the Middle of no-where!
Anyway, enough with all the emotions already! Sorry if I rant too much, just want to voice it out here. Okeey, I need to go. Ill be back again soon.
Hugs and Kisses